Interview

-
Q: You finally reached the first goal you set since the beginning, 200 posts. How do you feel about it?
A: Not easy, actually. Especially when I didn't start it for a living, and I have no skill for faking, I just did it whimsical when some sorts of emotions sparked in me so the words flow naturally. I think people name it authenticity, so yeah. I initially did some maths about how to reach the 200 faster, like, within a year. But most of the time my real life took over my plans. It took much longer than I expected. The outside world and inside world changed significantly during the 200 posts. But I made it, slowly. 

Q: Do you want to say something to your audience?
A: Yes, of course. I never advertised my stuff or pay to get attention so I'm not sure why I got audience, but somehow some people or one person kept supporting me even in my darkest day that I thought I'd never post anything again. I don't know what's so attracting here but they or IT always come back here to have a look like people who travelled far far away from home but always went back to hometown to see the changes(no change most of the time). I appreciate that, really. I know I like to boast how lonely I am or how much I love to be alone in the world. The true is, deep down, I know I'm not alone and I'll never be again because someone is watching over me. That's something beyond appreciation or words.


Q: Do you feel any difference from 1 to 200?
A: Sure. I'm proud of my memory, you know. I could recall everything I posted when it was 10. But one day, when I found something I posted in the past was read again. I tried to recall what the post was about from the title, but I couldn't. So I clicked it to read again, and that's the most amazing part, I was shocked by the way I crocheted words in the past, like, today I can never post something as good as that one. Sometimes I even forgot the reason I posted it or what inspired it. I'm glad I took some time to record those moments. I regret a bit that I couldn't capture many other moments that lay in the drafts. 

Q: Will you continue even though no one's watching?
A: I didn't start it to get attention, I like it so I do it. The majority of my life, I'm dancing in the dark while nobody's watching because I believed I was always alone. I'm not sure where will it leads to but I'll continue the journey no matter what.

Q: May I know your next goal? 
A: Infinity.

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Blue vs Red

-
Two officially compatible colors are running at your town. Who will win? The blue me or red you? The answer is easy—the one who loves more will win.  We love each other equally. The universe saw it. But what I'm loving? There's nothing there now, not a single word. The fact you enjoy being a stranger to me us is a hard fact I've learned to accept.
Read more

Aroma

-
Image
At night, the aroma of Mama's food still lingered the air in the house, as if mom just cooked us a delicious meal as those countless old days. I waited for mom's call from the kitchen to ask us to eat, but no sound. I kept the light on as usual, I wrapped myself in the cotton blanket, I closed my eyes. "Mama", I whispered.   I was long for mung bean pastry, a snack I loved since the first time I ate. So I decided to make it from scratch. One important ingredient is the lard. I noticed a bowl of fatty meat in the freezer for a while. So I took it out, defrost it. When it was boiling in the water, a lot of garlic gloves and dried shrimps were separated into the water. The images of mom peeling garlic and adding spices to the meat flashed in my mind, I held the spatula to stir the meat, so that my tears wouldn't drop. Then a familiar aroma of Mama's food drifted in the kitchen. I thought of the days mom cooking in the kitchen, I breathed deeply, I felt safe in th...
Read more

O My Love

-
Just text me if you really miss me or just wanna know what's going on in my mind.  What's the point to see the not-updated website again and again, the site can't chat to you like an AI.  Maybe you're pursuing the ascetic traits, the endurance, the more suffering and void you face the more alive you feel. Like, pain is what I'm living for, headache is the only way for you to take a break from the numbness?  O, P, q, my love, I want to love you but you can't accept that love. I still remember the day I cried like crazy when I realised you needed to end it and the pain under my chest.  They say a couple should definitely visit a temple together once, if they break up after the visit, don't feel bad for it because you're protected. If no break up then the next step is to consider the long-term commitment.  We've visited a temple the first day we communicated in another language. I, you on my palms, we were in a temple. Is it counted as we are still toge...
Read more